I have been thinking for a little while about writing something like this. I'm sure since the onslaught of social media, we've all started making mental lists of online habits we would like to bring to an end. And when I saw blogger Alaia Williams' post (it's great!) on Facebook habits that drive her crazy, I was motivated to get my list together and share.
I've been awfully preachy lately, I know, but hopefully it's been infused with enough wit and laughter to make it tolerable. Again, like lists I've made prior, I hope you will keep in mind that there are always going to be exceptions and that I am not the be-all, end-all knower of things. I am also a giant hypocrite and probably guilty of like 92% of these crimes.
In no particular order...
1. Serial likers. I'm sorry - I may be hurting someone's feelings. But give it a rest. You know what I'm talking about. That person who mere seconds after you post something, immediately clicks "like." And every. single. time. you post. It's creepy, right?
2. For tweet's sake, people (see what I did there?), auto-DMs are obnoxious. Stoppit. If I follow you, show your gratitude by following me back or tweet something at me sometime. But I don't need your sales-pitchy auto-direct message.
3. Incessant game requests. Take a hint. Enough said. I mean, I'm sure Candy Crush is a delightful game but the only candy I want is the kind I can put in my mouth and chew.
4. Adding me on Facebook or LinkedIn when we have no discernable connection. Who are you? How did you find me? Where can I get a restraining order?
5. People who do not know how to use comments and wall posts, etc. correctly. I'm sorry, I know there's a learning curve for a lot of you, but it still bugs me. If I'm in the middle of conversing with friends under the banner of a post I put up, it is not the place to ask me for my cookie recipe. Put it on my wall. It's another conversation.
6. Do NOT tweet people and ask them to follow you. That's not how it works, people. And double-don't do it with a hashtag to stack the deck. Tacky. You know what happened to the last account that did this to me? It got suspended (not because of anything I did, but just sayin'):
Sidebar - calling me out in public for not following you on a social media channel does not earn you a place in my heart. My follow has to be earned with content and engagement. My follow is valuable. I'm not even joking.
7. Liking your own status. We assume you like it. If you didn't, it stands to reason you wouldn't have posted it. I hope.
8. Vaguebook -- it speaks for itself. If you don't know what it means, you probably aren't bothered by the crime. Lucky you.
9. Moms who only post about their children and do so nonstop. Furthermore, I do not need to see photos of diapers, stitches, infections, etc. Similarly, people who post about how awesome their significant other is 19 times a week. This is probably a controversial one and easy for a single non-mom like me to whine about. But there it is.
10. More, quickly: too much political and/or religious content, posting on Facebook waaaaay too much (you know who you are), starting an argument with someone you don't know on a friend's Facebook status/thread... I would have said Facebook group messages at some point, but once they added the ability to leave the conversation, I was a much happier Facebooker. And I'm not going to get into hashtags because, well, frankly, I enjoy them as subtext and find them amusing more often than not, though I acknowledge incessant hashtagging annoys a lot of people.
I think a lot of folks will tell you it's in bad taste to post show off type things (like when I post a pic of a super cool event I'm at). I say do it. Social media is nothing if not hugely self serving. And ego enhancing. And actually, if you work in a field like mine, it becomes part of your portfolio -- don't think employers aren't checking you out. And maybe that's a good note to end on because I could go on and on and on about this, I'm sure.
Of course, the good news is, I can hide you from my feed, keep you off my Twitter lists, and so forth. Social media is fabulously customizable.
Did I call you out? Do you disagree? What social media or online habit drives you batty? What did I miss?
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