It seems appropriate to get a post up about online dating, as I was just named one of the "10 Best Blogs for Plus-Size Dating" -- an honor I am deeply flattered by; esepcially because my friend Kelly is on the list as well and I love her blog so much.
Just now, I got this astute message:
"Hi pretty girl. Can me get to know you?"
The latest online dating come-on: "So beautiful you are! Having a nice day you is?" I THINK YODA IS HITTING ON ME!— AJ (@AmandaJoy) March 19, 2014
Look, guys. I get it. I realize English isn't always going to be the first language and that perhaps my love of semi-proper grammar is a standard too high, but, as the wise men say, tough titties. Just stoppit.
In addition to these so-called flirations, I will no longer be entertaining the following opening lines or anything similar to their kind. Please note, these are all word-for-word real and the grammar, punctuation, etc. have not be altered:
- hey sexy, you have a Beautiful Smile.
- I'd love to get to know your more sometimes.
- i'm really attraced to your personality so I hope we can meet up sometime. Do you like sushi?
- Hi. I'm looking for a freind to have fun with who knows where it could go. I'm open. How about you?
- Your profile is really good but then I was your picture and was like WHOA. Care to text?
Sorry mom, but it doesn't look like I'll be meeting Mr. Right anytime soon!