CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL

True Love

I've found him. The man of my dreams.

 

Wedding date TBA.

No Rest For the Oh-So-Very-Weary

This morning's coffee date was futile. This is partially because I am a pussy and partially because he is. I throw my hands in the air in surrender. It's entirely possible I will be engaged soon and not even know about it.

I apologize for the vague-ness of that little vent however I am too tired and/or too lazy to really elborate and am happy to enlighten anyone via the ol' IM. Co-workers inquire within.

I can't remember the last time I slept in. The last time I had nothing to do, when I could NOT set the alarm, and irresponsibly sleep til noon. I can't even remember the last time I woke up early but got to take an irresponsible nap later in the day.

I. Am. Exhausted.

Last night, at my grandmother's house for Hanukah, I fell asleep after dinner, in a very strange position on the living room sofa. I came home and fought to stay awake, thinking I'd go to another party or to see my cousin who just got into town but no such luck- the bed beckoned me like donuts beckon cops (I am too tired for truly creative metaphors).

This afternoon: horrible. Came home from coffee date and faded in and out of consciousness for two hours, finally waking up for good, feeling more tired than ever and remarkably like I'd been hit by a bus (I look to Jaime for verification of how this actually feels).

December is so family filled and moreso for me with my mom, father and brother all having their birthdays in a two-week period so I was happy to have a friend come by for a little bit and I paid a vist to a friend earlier today for a few minutes so thankfully, I feel like less of a social leper. Of course now, after the ill-advised choice of iced tea with dinner, I am wide awake and considering some sleep-inducing options...  It's odd to feel exhausted and wide awake at once. But I am mastering this.

Happy first-night, everyone. I leave you with this prime example of why Hannah should never take my photo without warning:

Spirit

A Response

In response to the 11/23 "Fat Kids" entry, Monica writes:

There was a McDonalds one block away from my high school, and a Taco Bell not too much farther. At my middle school, the ice cream man would park himself right in front of the school once class let out.

I doubt many of my classmates needed a parent's transportation to procure unhealthy food on a daily basis. Especially with the crap they sold at the schools themselves.

In my opinion, the advertising is not the biggest issue here--the availability of bad food and the lack of sufficient health/nutritional education is the real culprit (from the parents and the school). Because, in reality, the parents aren't the ones decision makers, the kids are. When faced with the dorky school lunch, or the cool-kids'-a-la-carte menu items, kids are free to make their own fatty choices. I would venture to say that most parents are unaware that their kids are spending their "lunch money" on pizza and curly fries.

In most schools, or public schools at the very least, there are almost NO healthy options when it comes to the food schools provide. Probably the only way to ensure a healthy diet would be to bring your lunch everyday--and who wants to do that? Who has the time? For me, a kid who went to a public school that had no lockers, and had to carry my huge college-sized textbooks around with me everyday, carrying an adequate lunch was not an option.

Yes, the parents should be responsible, but there's only so much they can do (and should do--I mean forcing a bag lunch onto a high school kid is just asking for therapy later on). The schools need to act responsibly too, but it's especially hard in these times of enormous budget cuts in education. I know money's tight, but isn't the health of our nation important too?

I just thought it was so well-written, I had to share. Thanks, Monica!

Not Babies

On House this week, a patient in the clinic had a headache in the back of her head. She reached back to show House where it was and he immediately diagnosed her as pregnant, entering her 3rd trimester.

So now I know. My headache MUST mean the second coming...

{sigh}

I just love a good excuse to take Tylenol PM.

The Room, The Room, The Room is on FIRE!

Did I mention my apartment feels slightly like the ice age? In fact, when I got home tonight, Dennis Quaid asked me where Jake Gylenhall and Emmy Rossum were hiding (I pointed to the couch- there is some shit lurking under there).

Oh, and here's a good one-- we have no gas. I'm not even kidding. Through a series of unfortunate events (just call me Lemony Snicket), our gas was shut off. Some dildo in the neighborhood with a similar address gets his account cancelled and some asshat technician who needs a new perscription shuts MY gas off. I didn't really figure it out right away- I thought the cold weather was just making it really hard to get warm water in the shower and have been in too much of a hurry to think about it. We all know how often I cook so I wouldn't even notice the stove doesn't work... Fuck, did I mention it's COLD in here?

Anyway, some douche-nozzle (I am free-flowing with the rage today) at the gas company tells me I have to wait TWO weeks to get someone back out here to reverse the "little accident" but COME ON. I bitched as only I can and they will be coming out on Saturday. But don't worry! They were nice and specific with the time-- between 7am and 8pm.

Thanks, fucktards. I'm positively gleeful.

And out comes the little, beloved portable heater. $40 at Target a couple years ago and I get to have a lovely, toasty bedroom every Winter. Best $40 ever spent, my friends (save a few fun nights out that were ALSO a good $40 spent...).

Innocently, I unplug the decorative lamp I NEVER use (and let's face it, it's not that decorative) and plug in my heater. Start it up. Sit down and wait for the toasty, toasty toes. And then a smell... Burnt... something...

Well I did it. I set the room on fire. Because my day did not suck enough.

There was visible SMOKE coming out of my electrical socket, people. And sparks. Blue, shiny, scary SPARKS.

And from his room, Dan shouts "do you smell burning?"

I immediately think of Ralph Wiggum, by the way. Cause I'm that cool.

I probably should have thought about burning my hand but I just yanked that thing out of the socket (hand is not burnt, thank goodness) and CHRIST-ON-CRUTCHES, did my room smell.

To sum up?

Arctic wintery living room? Bad. Smokey, firey bedroom? Really bad. $40 space heater, fingerless gloves and a scented candle? Totally awesome.

It's Not a Tumor

Dear Headache,

For two weeks now, you've been rather inconspicuous, just lurking about the back of my head, near my neck, making me feel a bit fuzzy and dazed. And so I was quite annoyed when I woke up Sunday with an actual PAIN in the back of my head. A pain that has yet to go away or even take a break from ANNOYING. THE. SHIT. OUT OF ME. This morning, when I woke up, I couldn't even lift my head off the pillow. Oh sure, it was a nice excuse to sleep in a little but when I woke up later on, I felt no better and I had to go to the frickin' office.

Oh, I suppose I am mildly concerned. I did make a doctor's appointment for Saturday. But mostly I am annoyed. If I hold perfectly still, it's fine but move a smidge and THROBBBBBBB.

Ugh, I did something horrible in a past life to deserve this.

Product Referral

So here's something interesting... a company completely devoted to portion control. Can you stick with it? Can you stay that organized? (Can you afford it?)

It's actually not that expensive and actually, it's quite brilliant. I would imagine a lot of my problem has to do with portion control.

Kelli sent me this link and were I not having financial struggles right now, I might have been quick to buy up a lot of this stuff. I'd actually love to have a food scale and maybe some of this tupperware...

But here's the rub-- as long as there are restaurants, markets, vending machines and a refrigerator in my apartment, something like this would probably end up being useless to me. I'd be all gung ho about it in the beginning, but when the novelty wore off, as it always does with me (hey, I'm just being honest), they'd sit in my cabinet and collect dust.

I really do think it's a great idea. I wouldn't post it otherwise. I am just shamefully, supremely lazy. LOL. If someone tries this and wants to write about it -- I am not kidding -- I would love to hear about it. It would be interesting to me to see if organized portion control can make an earnest difference.