CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL

Masochism

If any of you sadists out there are just DYING to get a headstart on the 2011 swimsuit season, here's a good deal for you:

 
http://www.swimsuitsforall.com/products/25off-plus-size-swimwear

 

Happy Tacky Christmas

My little fake Christmas tree leans a little to the right. It's very sparse in "branches" and my ornaments are a motley mixture of random ornaments - some with stories behind them, some without. My favorite ornaments are the Tigger in his caroling outfit, the purple glass ball with gold dragonflies on it, and the glittery butterfly tree-topper. 

It's the tackiest tree ever from a girl who doesn't even celebrate Christmas.

Needless to say, I love my Christmas tree. 

While I was decorating the tree, stringing on the lights, I dropped them and broke one. I usually break one a year... Anyway, I carefully picked up the shards and resumed. 

I was sure I got all of it until later, when I had to sit down on the ground to adjust something. I felt a weird sting in my tush... 

Yessir, I sat on a piece of light bulb. 

I cut my tush.

It's a Christmas miracle. 

Happy tacky Christmas, kids! Laughter is the best medicine. Drink it up. 

Quote, er, Poem of the Day

I was on my way to a ceremony for the kiddies tonight when I started to reminisce about all the good times I had when I was in the same youth group (waaaaaay back in the 90s before BSB had to go on a resurrection tour with an 80s boy band to stay relevant)...

ANYWAY, this little poem we used to recite popped into my brain. I remembered the whole thing. And I had to share:

 

Why say 'tomorrow' when you could do it today?

After all, tomorrow is only one day away. 

Why say later? When you could say 'now?'

Why ask 'why,' when you can ask 'how.'

Why wait for more when you really need less?

Why jump to 'no' when the answer is 'yes.'

Why use two when just one will do?

Why wait for others, today starts with you. 

Okay, it's totally cheesy and typical of high school meaningfulness, but I love it and I am tickled I recalled the whole thing. :)

Anyone Tried This?

No one in my area is selling it and it looks refreshing and delicious... So anyone tried Sparkling Ice?

What I Didn't Do Today

It's quite remarkable what a person is able to convince themselves of. All alone. 

Like a person in a bad relationship, who is able to stay in sad relationship for far too long because you convince yourself of its worth...

That example has nothing to do with me. It was just the only thing I could think of to demonstrate with. I swear.

MY problem today was motivation. 

I somehow ended up with an empty schedule today. Not even a day of plans I deliberately cancelled. I mean, I had NOTHING going on. And at this busy time of year, that's pretty incredible to me. So much so, you can't imagine how many times I've checked and re-checked my calendar to make sure I'm not forgetting something pivotal. Or even not pivotal.

I even tried to MAKE plans for today. And came up short. Everyone is as busy as I am, or as sick as I am (I am saddled with my fourth or fifth sinus infection of the year but I don't let them derail me anymore). 

But nevermind! I was going to start my holiday shopping today! I was going to finally treat myself to a manicure. I was going to run out to the pharmacy and buy that eye shadow I am out of from MAC.

But when I woke up sharply at nine, without an alarm, mind you (so tragic I do that), it was POURING rain. And there a re so few things I love more than laing in bed, listening to the rain (well, I don't love doing that alone, but I'll take it). So I laid there for a while, playing on my laptop a little, and eventually, drifted off to sleep again. 

Up again a couple hours later, I woke up again. Still raining. Turned on the TV and watched some of "Avatar," a movie I seem to love more now on my little TV than I did in 3D on a ginormous screen (probably cause 3D makes me dizzy). And again, drifted off to sleep. 

I thought at some point, if I left the house around two, I'd have plenty of time to get some shit done anyway. 

Come to one o'clock, and my roommate is blasting music and showering. And I'm appalled I've slept til this hour. But I'm also starving. So my errands can wait and I go to town on my leftovers from last night's dinner. And wait! There's plenty of good stuff on the Tivo...

Well, since I don't have to go out for food (let's face it, if the fridge is empty, it's easier to get my ass out of the house), and I SHOULD clean out the Tivo a little, and it IS raining... 

So no, I did not get over to the store for my eye shadow. I didn't get out to the pharmacy (though in my defense, I did call them to refill my scrips and no one answered so I concluded they must be closed for some special reason). I decided holiday shopping should really wait til after Thanksgiving in case there are some killer sales I wanna get in on. And I can get a manicure tomorrow or after work one night this week, right?

It's amazing the thought process that went into this... And just weeks ago, I was upset about how hard it was to do nothing all day. I'm marking this down as progress, patting myself on the back and allowing myself to feel okay about it. 

Oh! New Graham Norton is on tonight! And SNL! YES. 

Fashion Fabulousness

I am in love with this dress.

There's really nothing special about it. And it's black, of course. But it's simple and pretty and I'd pair it with tights or leggings and sassy shoes. 

And dammit, it's out of stock! Ugh. Do you know how RARELY I find a dress I'll even consider trying on? Bollocks.

Boozing it up for the Holidays, Low-Cal Style

Crap. It's the holidays. The magical time of year when my body craves nothing but sugar, fat and carbs.

Did I mention I'm also prone to celebratory drinking this time of year? (Ok, ok, maybe all year long but especially for the holidays. Don't judge me.)

At Blogger Prom, you may recall I tried scotch for the first time... And you may recall I hated it (I cannot tell a lie - it made my nose burn). But, as I digress, the point is, it introduced me to The Baddish group, who represents several, delicious, lovely alcoholic beverage companies of which I am a fan. Perhaps you've heard of or seen Crystal Head Vodka? It's only the baddest-ass vodka bottle in town (and fun fact, it's owned by Dan Aykroyd). I've never had it but it looks cool... LOL.

But I digress. AGAIN.

Let me just get you to the good stuff. Someone at The Baddish Group was kind enough to lend me some under-200-calorie alcoholic drink recipes for you, my faithful readers. I hope you'll all try them and tell me what you think. I am definitely going to give them a whirl myself.

CHAMBORD Flavored Vodka & Perrier® - 108 Calories
1 ½ oz CHAMBORD Flavored Vodka
3 oz Perrier
Pour vodka into a glass filled with ice and top with Perrier. Garnish with a lemon wedge and a black raspberry.

 

Blueberry Cassis Fizz - 180 Calories
6 Driscoll’s blueberries
1/2 oz cassis
1 oz vodka
1 oz low-calorie cranberry juice
3 oz rosé sparkling wine, chilled
Lemon twist for garnish
3  Driscoll’s blueberries for garnish
Place blueberries, cassis, vodka, and cranberry juice in a rocks glass.  Muddle the berries well.  Add ice and the sparkling wine.  Give the cocktail a quick stir, and garnish with the lemon twist and blueberries threaded onto a bamboo toothpick.
© Tina Ruggiero, M.S., R.D. | The Gourmet Nutritionist

 

Chambord & Champagne – 199 Calories
1/2 oz Chambord Black Raspberry Liqueur
Korbel Champagne
Add Chambord to bottom of flute glass and top with champagne.

 

Quote of the Day

“You can focus on what is tearing you apart, or, on what is holding you together.”

-A very wise girl ;)