CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL

What's Up, Friday? Because Time Travel.

GREETINGS FROM THE PAST, FRIDAY! 

Dear internets, I am writing to you from Thursday. Hours and hours before you made that horrible decision to have a Starbucks Venti Frappucino before sitting in traffic for an hour. Long before you forgot to put deodorant for the day (you know who you are -- I can smell you from here). A whole day before that 3pm "WHY ISN'T THIS DAY OVER YET" lull sets in.

You see, I will be spending Friday hibernating and opening the laptop as little as possible. (Anyone wanna start a betting pool for this?)

But let us not cling to the past, muffins. Except for these few things that were awesome. You should still totally cling to these things and share them with your friends. 

1. I wanted to introduce you to my new business advisors: Tommy, Mick, Vince and Nikki.

This week, Mötley Crüe bassist Nikki Sixx (he's the one  in the very manly scarf) and his manager, Allen Kovac, sat down with Fast Company to give business advice. No, really. And it's genius. Or maybe I just love Mötley Crüe so much I'm biased, but you should give it a read. 

2. I have developed a new obsession with HitFix web series The Snap, hosted by evil genius, Louis Virtel. Each week he chimes in with three to four minutes of  witty commentary on the latest in pop culture. I love it - and him - so much. 

Get your beak wet with the first episode from March:

 

3. Another video discovery that made me smile... My favorite show So You Think You Can Dance is back for the Summer! And, as I tend to do when it's airing and I've got dance fever, I was tumbling down the YouTube Rabbit Hole late one night watching routines from the previous seasons. Then I found this and I COULD NOT STOP WATCHING AND SMILING. So much smiles. It's so amazing. I love it. 

 

Dear god, they're incredible. I've never seen such intricate footwork look so effortless. 

FYI, this should also be a lesson to us all -- there are like 19 million Urban Dance Camp videos out there in the world and I think I've watched all of them. Maybe someday I'll be productive again....

4. When I saw X-Men Days of Future Past (both times because I totally saw it twice opening weekend - don't judge me), this trailer preceded the movie.

 

Um, hello Colin Firth and all this amazing geeky awesomeness. I am so in. Has anyone heard anything about this movie? I consider myself an "in the know" movie fan but this trailer was a surprise to me. I'm so excited. I think it looks awesome. 

Generally, I seem to love anything Matthew Vaughn (the director) touches anyway. 

And Samuel L. Jackson is in it. As he is in everything. 

5. Does your heart swell up with happiness at the mere mention of Newsies like mine does? If so, you will love this video. 

BYU a cappella group Vocal Point and more than 85 other BYU student performers and crew pulled off a four-minute music Newsies medley video without any cuts.

It's insane. In fact, even if you don't like Newsies, it's still a lesson in production. The "Making of" video is totally worth a watch as well. 

 

Happy weekend, future dwellers. SEIZE THE DAY! 

Sorry I Had Sex on Your Bed: And Other Tear-Out Apologies -- And it's a Giveaway!

From the makers of the infamous Sex Position Coloring Book comes a new batch of.... honest literature. 

Ever wanted to find the right thing to say only to be left tongue-tied? Ever wanted so badly to tell someone where they can take their bad attitude but just too afraid to let it out?

Ever tweeted something like this?

I would like to start carrying post its with YOU ARE NOT A COMPACT VEHICLE pre-written on them.

— AJ (@AmandaJoy) March 14, 2014

Well how excited was I that Ulysses Press sent me these for review. GENIUS.

Sorry I Had Sex on Your Bed: And Other Tear-Out Apologies for Your Awkward Screwups is a hilarious collection of snarky mea culpa cards to be torn out and given to wronged friends, coworkers, and family members. It includes gems such as “I’m sorry I tried to spice things up without asking first" and these modern day predicament solutions:

Seriously?! Delightfully Passive Aggressive Cards is a perfectly brazen collection of cards designed to be left for roommates, frenemies, coworkers, strangers, and neighbors who’ve Gone. Too. Far. Examples: “Maybe tomorrow I could pet your elephants? Love, Your downstairs neighbor” and “Touch my lunch again and I’ll cut you.” (I think that will totes make me friends at the office.)

This one was my favorite....

You’re Cute: Cards to Break the Ice is a witty collection of cards to capture the attention of someone new. Favorites include “This is me flirting with you...” and “It was either this or a Missed Connection.” I should probably carry this with me at all social outings. It might serve me better than standing in the corner nursing a dirty martini....

I've saved the best for last though. 

Parking Tickets: For Those Who’ve Crossed the Line is a superb collection of snarky cards for drivers of badly parked cars. Try “I used to park like this. Then I turned 6” or “Hope you’re better between the sheets than you are between the lines.”

Well you know I had to try at least one of these books out, so I did. This one. The other night when a massive truck parked so close to my car I had to climb into my seat from the passenger side. But not before this:

BOOM. 

And you know I wasn't letting this go without a giveaway. The world must know they suck at parking or have sex too loudly next door. I want to share these books with all of you. Enter for a chance to win below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

Disclosure: Product was provided for review. Opinions were provided by me. 

My First Book Review: Love, Nina by Nina Stibbe

I have never done a book review on my blog and for good reason. I have very strange taste and most of the time, as I'm sure it does with many, my mood dictates what I read, so assigned reading is basically a headache to me. 

But Little, Brown and Company (they represent this one guy you may have heard of - James Patterson) was very understanding - they gave me a lot of book choices and promised not to hold me to any tight deadlines. So it seemed like a great opportunity to challenge myself with this blog post topic and try something new. 

And so I began Love, Nina by Nina Stibbe, an endearing compilation of letters home about quirky personalities, family, food, friends, laughter and above everything, love and affection. 

I almost feel like a cheat reviewing it because on of my all-time favorite authors, Nick Hornby, has already recommended it and how could I say anything better than the author of High Fidelity?

"Well, it turns out that Love, Nina is the funniest and most eccentric book I have read this year, and I am certain that it will be very loved for many years to come..."

He's right. The book is funny and eccentric. It is familiar somehow, though it is set in the early 80s and takes place in the UK. However, that said, I am quite the anglophile -- I love all things Brit. (If you don't, not to worry, there are fun glossaries all over this here internet and a "who's who" key at the front of the book makes it super easy to dive in.) 

Specifically, Love, Nina takes place in 1982, when 20-year-old Stibbe moved to London to work as a nanny for a successful and respected publisher and her two opinionated, lively and often hilarious young sons. In frequent letters home to her sister, Nina described her trials and triumphs: there's a cat nobody likes, meals made no one will eat, suppertime visits from a famous local playwright, a mysteriously unpaid milk bill, and repeated misadventures parking the family car. Dinner table discussions cover the gamut, from the greats of English literature, to swearing in German, to sexually transmitted diseases. Often with added, mischievous commentary from two little boys who sometimes seem wise and acquainted with sarcasm far beyond their years. 

Nina has much to learn from all the personalities in her life! I love her pure, simple and sometimes dry observations about things. In how she recounts all of her stories to her sister, I felt warm and  humored. It comes across clearly, as she describes the young boys she's a nanny for, that she is amused by their antics - even when she should be a little annoyed - and loves them very much. And also, that she cares about their mum as well -- who seems like a formidable, admirable woman in her own right. 

Overall, Love, Nina was a light, easy read that I think a lot of you would enjoy. Highly recommend it for a buffet of reasons! 

Find Love, Nina on Amazon and Goodreads. It comes out on April 22 but you can pre-order now. It would also be a lovely, wonderful Mother's Day gift! 

Disclosure: I was provided with an advanced Kindle edition of this book so that I could honestly review it. There are no affiliate links or anything of that nature in this post - mostly because Amazon rejected me due to some of my racier content. Lame!

Spending Time in The Last Bookstore

Located on the ground floor of the Spring Arts Tower downtown, The Last Bookstore is aptly named. While there is plenty of new inside (they do indeed sell new books), when strolling through it's aisles and wandering the labyrinth of SciFi and myster novels upstairs, the store really does feel like the last bookstore. I read about this place a while back and have always wanted to go, so when I found myself downtown on Saturday morning, I impetuously stopped by for a minute-turned-hour-and-a-half. 

I enjoyed sitting in an oversized, old leather chair jusy reading -- the store has marvelous light. And I equally enjoyed wandering up and down almost every single aisle, adding books to my mental wishlist as I went. The labyrinth upstairs is a sight to behold -- it's really whimsical and endearing. At the end, a tunnel under a bridge of books leads to a gigantic room unlike anything I've ever seen -- just shelf after shelf, aisle after aisle of books, each only a dollar to buy. And off to the side, a vault of true crime books.

As it was such a sight to behold, I took a lot of photos. 

I smiled while looking over this old globe, which still had the USSR and a divided Germany.

At the end of my visit, I did buy one book. It was only $5! Can you guess which one?

 

"This Book Will Ruin Your Life..." -- Um, YIKES!?

You gotta be intrigued by a book whose Facebook page is headlined as such:

Yes, the thought of change scares me shitless. People who embrace change openly and on a regular basis also scare me shitless. You people need to embrace a couch and a bottle of wine.

Not the biggest fan of the self-help genre but I do enjoy a laugh so if this book is as hilarious as the press release claims, perhaps you will find me praising it in a few weeks. Plus, it's got the header "Modern Day Wizard" on it -- does this mean Harry Potter makes an appearance? I certainly hope so...

Ok, enough joking. In all seriousness, jaw-droppingly honest and at times “laugh out loud” funny, “Call Off The Search” is unlike any other relationship, self-help book. Co-written by Anna Wallas (formerly Pasternak), the New York Times bestselling author, and former columnist for leading UK newspaper The Daily Mail and Andrew Wallas, the UK’s top relationship guru and sought after therapist, “Call Off The Search” is a frank and fearless journey to the heart of a modern relationship. 

After years of searching, disappointment, heartbreak and divorce, Anna and Andrew found each other. With the joy of their profound connection came the agony of past heartbreaks and unresolved pain. Rather than hide, ignore it or walk away, husband and wife duo Anna and Andrew embarked on a terrifying quest right to the core of themselves and each other. The couple’s dual narrative provides a unique insight from both male and female perspective along with practical ways to free ourselves from the burden of inner pain.  Andrew offers a new and daring mode of self-exploration, which is complimented by the outrageous and sometimes hilarious honesty of his wife, Anna.

I find it all hopelessly romantic in the best way possible. And I'm in that kind of mood lately. 

The fine print: “Call Off The Search” is available on Amazon from Cadogan Publishing and on Kindle in the US. Find it on Facebook here.

Shit like this makes me so happy!

Kudos to Goodreads for creating a social network for book lovers. I'm obsessed. 

Should be interesting to see how the net changes now that Amazon has purchased it.

But in any case, they are hosting a discussion group for fans of Maria Semple, author of a quirky, unique book I recently read called Where'd You Go, Bernadette, It was a slow burn but I think about halfway through I started to really love it and by the end, I was sad to be done (in a good way -- you know what I mean). So I was excited to post a question on the discussion board, sit back and see if the author answered it.

And she did!

How do you not LOVE social media, people? Ten years ago, could you have had an opportunity to ask one of your favorite authors a question and get an answer from her like that?

I love it. 

 

P.S. (Is it unprofessional to put the word "shit" in my headline? Oh well.)

My Happiness Project

In case you had not heard, I have declared war on 2012. 

Following 2010 and 2011, two years of utter schtickdreck (a colorful Yiddish word my grandfather used to mean "crap"), I am mindfully determined that 2012 will be filled with positive things. 

A big part of that is my "33 in 2012" list, which you may be following. I decided in this year of positivity, I would finally kick the ass of several things I've always thought of or talked about but never done. Each time I complete one thing or work toward completing something, I feel really great about myself and it reinvogirates me to keep checking them off. One item on that list that I am particularly enjoying is the goal to read more this year. I've completed four books in the last few months, which is a lot for me with my busy schedule, and it has made me feel amazing. I forgot how much I love to read and I feel like it keeps my mind vital or something. It makes my imagination work overtime - there is nothing wrong with that. 

Another hugely surprising part of being happy lately? Pinterest. I know it's a tremendous time-suck and about 75% of the universe is using it already, but it's become rather meaninggul to me. Perhaps because I am such a visual person and I so quickly forget ideas after they pop into my head, PInterest has sort of allowed me ot bring all this thoughtfulness to life. There are all my likes and hopes and aspirations in living color, on my computer monitor. It's actually driven me to tackle a couple big projects like redecorating my bedroom.

P.S. If you need an invite to Pinterest, lemme know. Happy to do it.

P.P.S. Pinterest, I'll take that endorsement check whenever you're ready. ;)

And recently, I started reading Gretchen Rubin's book, The Happiness Project, which two friends gave me for Hannukah last year. It has long been on my "to read" list and I'm already engaged, just 11 pages in. I've already created an account on the THP website and subscribed to Rubin's newsletters (I don't do anything halfway, you know).  

Anyone else doing this? Read the book? I'd love to hear.

What IS The Happiness Project? A few years ago, Rubin had an epiphany and asked herself, “What do I want from life, anyway?” and thought, “I want to be happy”—but I never spent any time thinking about happiness. I should do a happiness project!” Thus, she has. Practical to her lawyer-core, Rubin weaves together philosophy, science, history, analysis, and real-life experiences as she finds what works for her— and what didn’t. And she is honest. She finds often times her learnings are counter-intuitive and shares that. But in the end, it seems her Happiness Project convinced her that it is possible to be happier by taking small, concrete steps in daily life.

I heard Rubin speak at BlogHER '11 and it's not been far from my mind since. I am particularly fond of her because, like me, she's a list-lover. Her lists like the "Twelve Personal Commandments" and "Four Splendid Truths" really resonate with me. I look forward to reading more of this book and participating in my own Happiness Project. 

Cheers, my friends. Here's to being happier in the coming year! I am emrbacing 2012! 

Better to be an Idiot or a Dummy?

Yes, it's true. I am the proud owner of both the Idiots and Dummies social media manuals. 

My first Dummies guide was the "Sex for Dummies" which I purchased as a joke, intending to keep it out on the coffee table for display and conversation. After some teens were in my home and saw the book, I realized it might be smarter to hide it away. 

But I digress.

Having both of these in my posession made me curious - which is the superior tool (pun intended)? 

Off the cuff, I can't tell you which I'd rather be. Idiot? Dummy? Is one adjective a little less mean than the other? All joking aside, after going through them both, I settled on IDIOT. Here's why: The Idiot's Guide breaks everything down a little more basically. It's also very practical-minded. Whereas with the Dummies book, I feel like it's got a nice sense of humor but a little more "stereo instruction"-ish. Also, could totally do without all the product placement in the Dummies book. Intentional or not, I should not feel the desire to buy TIDE after I read it -- it's a little unsettling. The Idiots folks seem to make an effort against such a thing. 

So... I guess.... I'm an idiot, but not a dummy? You tell me. LOL. 

To purchase your own Complete Idiot's Guide at www.idiotsguides.com, you can use the code CIGBlog11 at check-out and get 50% off. Nice deal.